Hi folks, here’s the latest in our series of lighthearted ‘slice of life’ dispatches, straight from our anonymous reporter in the field!
Celebrating her shiny levomepromazine-induced ability to digest items of nutritional value, local resident Sheena Fletcher decided to make a cooling sweet treat to enjoy in the sunshine – and to make it more interesting, she decided to only use items which can be acquired within the building!
Ms Fletcher told us she’s named her sickening abomination (pictured below) ‘Sheena’s Chemo Dream’ and that, according to the rules of the challenge, she concocted it using only items she found in the wellbeing centre kitchen, plus a couple of ingredients she was finally able to force out of the haunted vending machines in the outpatient area. These only needed a few small blood sacrifices so it is a thrifty recipe indeed!
Sheena’s keeping the exact recipe a secret but she did let slip that the ingredient list contains: half a can of 7 Up, some raspberry ripple ice cream, the mangled remains of a Tunnock’s teacake, and some of that off-white powdery goop that you sometimes get instead of coffee from the weird machine outside the infusion centre.
Our reporter tried a sip of the colourful beverage and found it deliciously decadent – although most of her taste buds have recently been destroyed at the molecular level by powerful cytotoxins, so we’re aware you folks at home might not agree!
Sheena said she’s hoping the #SheenasChemoDream challenge will ‘go viral’ and get people making their own versions. Our official line is that encouraging virality may be slightly irresponsible given the colossal amount of immunocompromised people in our local population, but in the spirit of early summer fun, why not try it at home and let us know what you come up with?!